Yesterday was hard. Real hard. Lots of doctors; lots of decisions, lots of different opinions on what would happen. Nothing a parent wants to hear. My mom and dad drove in from SD. Steve came. Matthew was sick. We had lots of Dr.'s coming in and out. We couldn't keep Matthew's fever down, and he was pasty white with cold hands and feet. Matthew was septic. The piece of bacteria in his heart had reinfected either his blood or his lungs or both. Some doctors painted more of a dismal picture than others. After we'd collected all the data from the doctor's and prayed; we felt like we needed to decide what would be best for Matthew. Comfort was number 1. Medications were ordered for comfort. Antibiotics were changed and added. We learned that his kidneys had taken a hit from the sepsis, although they were still producing urine. We will monitor his kidneys and his breathing status closely. We will help his body breathe if he needs it. We will give his body a good chance to fight this.
He had a decent night with only one bought of pain in the evening that was quickly remedied with Morphine. He has slept almost the whole time, and that is ok.
Today, looks a touch improved. He has spells where he is breathing easier. His color is a bit better. He recieved a blood transfusion today because his hemoglobin is low. He is still getting low grade fevers and he is still asleep. But he is breathing on his OWN and still making urine.
Thank you Thank you everyone for praying, for sending texts, for your kind words on facebook. It is overwhelming and I have no words to describe it. Please continue to pray. God is listening. He always does.
We have prepared ourselves (if one can do that) for the worst; but are pleading to God for the best. When you have a child with special needs, you always wonder "when, and how". I know Matthew's lifespan will not be as long as you and I. We know that one of these times, God will not answer our prayers in the way we are asking, but it will still be in His will, and His time, and God will still be good. He's good all the time. I, of course am praying that he will be healed; but even more I am seeking God's will. He knows what is good for us. Matthew's little life has lessons for us, and we do not know what his struggles will teach someone else. And this life is not Matthew's eternal home. He has so much waiting for him; there will be many "stars in his crown". He is a fighter and a blessing. We love him very much, but we are the ones that will have it hardest when he isn't here; not him. So, the only, ONLY thing we as parents are trying to do, is not be selfish.
Please continue to pray. Your kind words mean so much to us all. If you are wondering what you can do for us, please pray. Pray for strength, wisdom and healing. I will do my best to keep all updated so you know how to pray.